Valentines Day! Konoha Style! A Change in Tune
by xOProcrastinator
Summary: A random AU fic in a high school setting, involving chocolate, anti valentiners, and our favorite mischivious diaper wearing holiday spirit


AU: I own no characters from Naruto.. is but a mere author with too much time and a bad habit of procrastinating

Howeverrr.. Natsu, Aogiri Amaya (A.k.a. Kaiya), and Shira **do** belong to me and my two friends..

* * *

Valentine's Day! Konoha Style!  
Change of Tune

"Have you prepared our rations for Single Awareness Day?" Kaiya questioned.  
"It's all here " Natsu sang pointing to the collection of chick flicks, chocolate, and pints of ice cream.  
"SUCCESSSS!!!" Tenten exclaimed putting up the anti-valentines day decorations.  
Sakura sweatdropped, "I don't see what you guys have against Valentines day.."  
"Honestly!!! I LOOOOOOOOOOOVE THIS HOLIDAAAY!!!" Ino exclaimed clutching onto a large pink heart, "AND THIS YEAR SASUKE-KUN'S **SURE** TO ASK ME TO BE HIS VALENTINE!!!!!!!"  
"NO WAY INO-PIG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Sakura exclaimed, "SASUKE-KUN WILL DECLARE HIS UNDYING LOVE FOR **MEEE!!"  
**"You guys are ruining the anti-love theme..." Kaiya sweatdropped..  
Ino hmph'd.. "Well count me out of thiss!! I'm going to find Sasuke-kun!!!"

"This holiday is troublesome." Shikamaru observed, cringing at the pink hearts adorning the high school.  
"It burnssssssss!!!!!" Kiba hissed..  
"Oh PLEASE! You guys are so sensitive to pink." Haku scoffed.  
Sai shrugged, dropping one of his many valentines.. "Curses!!" he exclaimed bending down to pick it up again, only to drop the rest of the contents in his arms.  
"HOW CAN YOU HAVE THAT MANY VALENTINESSS?!!!" Naruto exclaimed, a vein pulsing in his forehead.  
Sai just grinned, "You'd have more valentines too if you grew a--"  
Sai's sentance was interrupted by Neji and Sasuke running down the halls followed by fangirls.. "COME BAAAAACK NEJI-KUN!! I MADE THESE COOKIES ESPECIALLY FOR YOU!!!!!!" "SASUKE-KUN!!!! I LOVE YOUUUU!!!!!!!"  
"OMG LOOK! IT'S SAI-KUN!!!" a random fangirl screeched pointing to the black haired boy standing off to the side, arms laden with heart shaped objects. "OMG!! GET HIM!!!" the other girls exclaimed changing direction and running towards Sai who just smirked.  
_"THEY STOPPED!!!" _Sasuke and Neji thought happily.  
Neji and Sasuke walked over to the group of boys, to find Kiba and Naruto pouting.. "Having a good valentines day, dobes?" Sasuke prodded.  
"SHUT UP!!!!!!!" Kiba and Naruto exclaimed in unison.

"Aren't we going to get in trouble for ditching school today?" Sakura offered.  
"Don't think about that! Do we really wanna face couples making out in the halls everywhere we turn?!?!!!!!" Kaiya exclaimed hysterically grabbing the pink haired girl's shoulders and shaking her..  
"Maybe someone will give **you** a valentine?" Sakura said again.  
Kaiya blinked.. "I hadn't thought about that..." she admitted.  
"NOOOOOOOOO!!! DON'T LISTEN TO HERRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!" Natsu cried.  
"But she has a point!!!" Tenten said thoughtfully..  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Natsu shouted as though in physical pain. "DON'T GIVE UP OUR ANTI-VALENTINE IDEAAAALSSS!!!!!"  
"But I haven't had a valentine since back in elementary school..." Kaiya pouted.  
"Yeah!! Let's go back to school!!!" tenten exclaimed grabbing onto Kaiya and Natsu and Sakura and dragging them out the door, "IF WE HURRY WE CAN STILL GET THERE BEFORE THE BELL RINGS!!!!"  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Natsu's shout could be heard throughout the neighborhood..

"_I wonder where everyone else is... They promised they'd help me ask Naruto-kun to be my valentine..;_" Hinata thought poking her fingers together as she looked around the hall.  
"HEY HINATAA!!" Naruto waved from down the hall, causing the shy girl to blush.  
"_NOOOOOOOOO!! I'M NOT READY!!!"_ Hinata thought frantically, running down the hall and away from Naruto.  
"That was weird.." Naruto said, scratching the back of his head..  
"Face it. You're a chick deflector." Kiba smirked.  
"SHUT UP!!! LIKE YOU'RE ONE TO TALK!!!" Naruto complained irritably.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHH!! SLOW DOWN TENTEN!!!!" Sakura wailed..  
"SORRY!!!" Tenten called, detatching her hand from Sakura's arm..  
"EEEEEP!!" Sakura squealed, her momentum carrying her right into a certain brooding red-head.  
"_OMG AHH!!_" Gaara thought before falling into the floor with a grunt..  
_"TwT;;; I think I amost had a heart attack_" Sakura thought dazedly, standing up from her spot on top of a person.  
"_What the heck landed on meeeeee????" _Gaara complained inwardly, standing up and turning around to come face-to-face with Sakura.  
"AHHH!!" Sakura screeched again.. "GOMEN ASAI GAARA-SAN!" she apologized quickly.  
Gaara blinked.. "...It's fine?" he offered looking somewhat confused.  
"Anyway! Happy valentine's day!!!" Sakura said before running off after her quickly moving friends.. _"That was close TwT;_" she thought to herself..

"THERE you guys are!!!" Shira exclaimed. "Hinata was looking all over for you!!!"  
Kaiya gasped, "OHHHHHHHHH.. I **KNEW** I WAS FORGETTING SOMETHING!!!!!!!!!!!"  
"You're a horrible friend, you know that right?" Natsu said, poking the black haired girl.  
"SHUT UP!! YOU PROMISED TO HELP TOOOOO!!! "  
"Oh YEAAAAAAAH, huh?" Natsu said thoughtfully.  
Tenten sweatdropped.. "_OMG NO!!!!!! IT'S ALREADY STARTING!!!!!!!! ;;_" she thought desperately when she saw a couple making out out of the corner of her eye. _"IT BURNSSS!!!!;"_ she thought, her eye twitching, just as Neji ran by..  
"SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!" he cried latching onto the brunette.  
tenten blinked.. "This is awkward..." she announced.  
_"FANGIRLS... CLOSING IN..."_ Neji thought to himself desperately looking around to find himself surrounded by drooling girls.. "NOOOOOOOO!!" he screeched clutching tighter to Tenten who sweatdropped.. _"There's only one thing to do in a time like this!!!_" he thought despeartely, turning to face the brunette. He quickly closed the space between their faces and kissed her, much to the surprise and horror of his adoring fans..  
"NOOOOOO!! NEJI-KUN!!!" they wailed..  
After awhile, Neji pulled away from Tenten and grinned, "Tenten, will you be my valentine?" he asked.  
"HECK YESSS!!!!!!!" tenten exclaimed hugging him.  
"AWWWWWWWW THAT WAS SO CUTEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!" Shira and Natsu crooned.  
Kaiya's cloud of gloom simply appeared over her head.. _"TwT;; Tenten got a date and I didn'tttttt..._" she whined to herself.

"Come on, come on!!!" Kaiya exclaimed pushing her friend towards Naruto at lunch.  
"B-B-B-But what if I'm not ready??" Hinata said, blushing furiously.  
"Too laate!" Kaiya hissed as they stopped in front of the blonde boy.  
"HEY HINATAAAAA!!" he said loudly.  
"OH! I just remembered! I have to go puke from all the pink and love surrounding me!" Kaiya said, quickly running away from the couple.  
"That was really odd.." Naruto blinked.  
Hinata nodded her agreement, "N-N-N-N-Naruto-kun.." she stuttered, blushing furiously.  
"Hmmmmmmmmm?" the blonde asked glancing down at Hinata.  
"I was wondering.."  
"..."  
"I mean, if you don't already have one..."  
"..."  
"W-Would you be my valentine!!!!!!!!!!!!!?" she finally asked in a shrill voice.  
"SURE!! Why didn't you just say that before?!" naruto asked pulling the girl into a hug.  
"YAAAAAAAAAAY!!!" Kaiya exclaimed to herself from behind a nearby bush.  
"_TwT;; Even Naruto-baka got a valentinee!!!"_ Kiba sulked.

During lunch that day, Kaiya, Natsu, and Shira were huddled behind a bush trying to escape all the hearts that seemed to be zooming around.  
"I CAN'T TAAAKE IT ANYMOREEEEE!!!" Natsu wailed.  
"It's not that bad.." Shira blinked.  
"SUUUUUUUUUREE!!!" natsu exclaimed, her eye twitching, "MAYBE YOU'RE JUST BECOMING ONE OF THEEEEEM!!!!" she cried pointing towards all the couples cuddling.  
"Is anyone else cold? I'm COLD." Kaiya complained irritably, changing the subject.  
Shira sweatdropped, wondering why she hung out with these people.

"Sakura." Gaara said from next to her locker.  
"EEP!" the pink haired girl screeched, almost dropping all her books. _"How can he always pop up out of nowhere??"  
_"Do you have a valentine?" he asked suddenly.  
"N-not that I know of..." Sakura stuttered in reply.  
"Would you be mine?" he asked looking uncomfortable.  
_"Well he sure gets to the point.._" sakura thought to herself.. **_"HELL YEA!! A MAN WITH INITIATIVE!!!!_**" inner sakura exclaimed. "S-Sure." she replied, blushing slightly.  
"Great." Gaara said, flashing her the first smile she had ever seen from him.  
"SAKURAAAAAAAAAAA!!!" Ino called waving from down the hall before running down the hall towards the new couple, dragging Shikamaru behind her. "Looks like you've got a valentine!!!" Ino congratulated.  
"You too!" Sakura observed.. "What happened to Sasuke-kun?"  
Ino shrugged, "He's got half the population of girls in the school chasing after him.. Besides.. Shikamaru will be a much better boyfriend since I don't have to worry about him cheating on me!"  
Temari popped up on the other side of Shikamaru.. "Hey Shikamaru!" she greeted, "I was wondering...--" she started before opening her eyes to come face to face with her fellow blonde cheerleader.  
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH SHIKAMARU!!!!!!" Temari shouted  
"HE'S **MY** VALENTINE!! WHERE WERE **YOU** TRYING TO DO JUST NOWWWWWWWWW?!!!!!" Ino screeched..  
_"Troublesome.._" Shikamaru thought, trying to edge away from the two blondes.  
"YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" they shouted in unison.

Kiba rocked back and forth on his heels, looking for a girl without a valentine.. He spotted one and walked up to her.. but before he could open his mouth she replied, "NO." _"TwT;; Girls suck._" he thought to himself. "HEY NATSUUUUUU!!" he called, spotting the brunette at her locker.  
"NOOOOOOOOO!" she shouted.  
"PLEAAAAAASE?"  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!"  
"PREEEEEEETTTTTTTYYYY PLEAAAAAAASE?"  
"...Maybe."  
"YAAAAAAAY!" Kiba cried hugging the brunette.  
"WHere's my chocolate?" she asked half jokingly.  
"Here!" Kiba said ecstatically, pulling a heart shaped chocolate box from behind his back.  
Natsu blinked.. "How bout my flowers?" she grinned.  
"Right! I knew i was forgetting something!" Kiba said, pulling those from behind his back too..  
"I was just kidding..." Natsu said looking slightly disturbed.  
"Oh.." Kiba blinked.. "Oh well!"  
"You were **that** desperate to get a date?"  
"yes."  
"You're pathetic."  
"SHUT UP! You wouldn't have had a valentine if it weren't for me!!!!"  
"WELL YOU WON'T HAVE ONE EITHER IF YOU DON'T STOP SAYING SUCH THINGS!!!!!!!!"  
Kiba let out a whimper sounding like a wounded dog.. "You're so abusive, Natsu.. ;;"  
"Damn straight!" Natsu giggled.  
"_She has mood swings_" Kiba thought to himself..

"Here comes Sai again.." Kaiya sweatdropped, watching sai and his fangirls walking around the corner.  
Shira hmph'd.. "He's such a manwhore."  
"You're just saying that because you're mad that he won't go out with you."  
"NU-UH!!!!!!" Shira retorted, crossing her arms stubbornly.  
"Denial's bad for you.."  
"I'm NOT in denial!!!"  
"OK then... HEY SAI!!!!!" Kaiya shouted, waving her arms to get the boy's attention.. "SHIRA WANTS TO TELL YOU SOMETHING!!!!"  
"EEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!!" Shira cried, tackling Kaiya to the ground before she could say anything else.  
Kaiya smirked triumphantly.. "Not in denial, eh?"  
"Go awaaayyy.." Shira moaned.  
"Well.. if you **do** get a valentine, you know you'll get chocolate right?"  
At the mention of chocolate, Shira's ears perked up.. "Chooooocolaaaaaaateeeeeee?" she asked, grinning slightly crazily.  
"Mmhmm." Kaiya nodded in affirmation.  
"SAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!" Shira called running after the boy.  
"My work here is done." Kaiya said to herself grinning... She looked around for her friends, only to find them all with their valentines.. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..." she wailed, her infamous Cloud of Gloom appearing over her head as she rocked back and forth on her heels.  
Natsu poked the cloud happily while Kiba sweatdropped.. "Cheer up, Kaiya-chan!" she advised.  
Kaiya just hissed in response, sinking into the ground to get away from all the love.

Hovering in the air, invisible to the humans Cupid frowned.. "This won't do!" he said. "Honestly, there's gotta be **one** boy in this school without a valentine.." he mused, tapping his chin and zooming around the school.  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" he heard a wail below only to find Haku being chased by an energetic Lee.. "GO AWAY!!! I"M STRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIGHTTT!!!!!!!" he cried.  
Lee giggled, "Sure you are, Haku-san."  
"...That's disgusting. ;;" Cupid announced to himself.. "Although ALL love is beaaaaaaaaaaaauuuuuutifulllll!!!!!!!!!!!!" he added.  
"_I'm too young to have a gay admirer who wants to molest meeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_" haku wailed inwardly as cupid flew away.

"AHA!" the mischievous diaper-wearing holiday spirit exclaimed appearing in the boy's bathroom to find a traumatized looking Sasuke hiding in the corner. "This'll do quite nicely!!! Now to get him out of the bathroom.. And for the girl to find him.."  
A few minutes later, assured that his fangirls were preoccupied with finding actual valentines of their own, Sasuke emerged from the bathroom, looking around paranoidly..

"Come on, Kaiya-chaan!! Cheer up!" sakura prodded the gloomy girl.  
"easy for you to say.. you're not the only girl in school without a valentine..." Kaiya replied.  
"Yes.. buuuut.. I'm sure there's plenty of guys still available..."  
"Yeah.. like drooling Danny."  
"Actually... he has a valentine too.." Sakura sweatdropped..  
"Whooooo?"  
"Ehh.. Pizza face Penelope." Sakura said.  
"I'm totally patheticc!!!" Kaiya exclaimed sinking deeper into depression.  
"NOOOO! Come on!!! WE'LL FIND YOU A VALENTINE YET!" she said determinedly.. "Right gaara?"  
Gaara grunted in response, unhappy about having to share Sakura.  
"I always knew I liked that girl!" cupid grinned.. "Then again.. it was probably the pink hair that caught my attention before her love of love."

"This is stupid.. now I don't have **any **valentines.." Sasuke sulked to himself. He cringed, seeing the hallways filled with couples making out.. "HAVE YOU NO MODESTYYYYY!!!!!" He shouted.. not that anyone paid attention to him.   
"Stop your shouting, Uchiha..." Kaiya complained popping up out of the ground..  
"Stop eavesdropping on people's conversations, Aogiri."  
"It's kinda hard **not** to eavesdrop with you shouting your lungs out."

"Just my luck.." Cupid sighed.. "They fight too much.. I guess I'll have to bring out my not-so-secret weapon for this..." cupid quickly drew his arrows of love, and knocked two into his infamous bow. Aiming carefully, he fired one at Sasuke and one at Kaiya. Both arrows quickly hit their marks.

"Ow!" Sasuke hissed.  
"THAT'S RIGHT!!! FEAR MY RETORTS!!!!" Kaiya exclaimed triumphantly before feeling the momentary pain of being struck by love.  
"Who cares about retorts!" Sasuke exclaimed, dropping to one knee. "Aogiri Amaya, be my valentine!!!"  
"OF COURSEEEEEEE!!!!!" Kaiya exclaimed hugging the boy, who in return kissed her.  
"EVEN THOUGH THIS CHANGE IN MY MOOD IS INCREADIBLY RANDOM AND ABRUPT, I FEEL I MUST DECLARE MY UNDYING LOVE FOR YOU!!!"  
"HUSH!! Don't speak!" Kaiya said kissing him again. _"  
_"That was so increadibly weird..." Natsu observed sweatdropping.. "I hope they're feeling alright..."  
"I don't think they are..." Kiba announced.. "Let's leave before we catch whatever they've caught.."  
"Good idea!" Natsu agreed for once.

"My work here is done!!" cupid announced happily, zooming away to spread valentine's joy to other people all over the world.

Meanwhile.. in a dark corner.. Shira was sitting surrounded by many boxes of chocolates.. "MY PRECIOUSSSSSSSSSSS" she hissed, popping another chocolate into her mouth.

"HAPPY VALENINE'S DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!" Naruto, Hinata, Tenten, Neji, Shira, Sai (and his multiple valentines), Kiba, Natsu, Gaara, Sakura, Shikamaru, Ino and Temari (who took a break from argueing over who's valentine Shikamaru was), Sasuke, Kaiya, and Haku called in unison. Lee would have joined in, only Haku tied him to the flag pole so he wouldn't chase him anymore.  
"AND TO ALL A GOODNIGHT!!!" Cupid giggled from somewhere over America, where the good little freshmen were still rejoicing because they had a snow day today.

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prologue:

The next morning, Kaiya woke abruptly, sitting up straight in her bed, trying to recall yesterday's events. It all suddenly came back to her in a flash of comrehenshion, causing her to shout, "EWWWWWW I KISSED UCHIHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! I"M FOREVER CONTAMINAAAAATREEEEEEEEEDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!" Kaiya's shriek rang through the town, while Sasuke was currently busy throwing up at the memory.  
_"I HATE VALENTINE'S DAAAAY!!!!!!!!"_ they thought.

* * *

AU: YAAAAY FOR RANDOMNESS!!! If you didn't like the story, blame it all on the chocolate I was eating while writing this xD 


End file.
